Sunday, 7 September 2014

Social networks are ruining my life


I swear -  I’m on social networks like all day, every day, to the point of obsession where I am always touching my phone every few minutes, never missing any post from anyone, even catching up to posts I last saw AND I FREAKING HATE IT. 

Why am I like this? Are you this way too? Always in the know, never disconnected. It’s obsessive, wasteful and it’s exhausting. I guess there is a sense of ego involved - knowing things before everyone else, seeing breaking news as it happens, consuming the newest of new information all at your fingertips, always updated. Then there's also that feeling of pseudo-connection where you feel like one less lonely person by distracting yourself with all these social networks to help you forget that you don't have a cute boy to text… (kidding! kind of). I don’t know how healthy this is (probably not at all), but I think that it’s a major underlying reason why we use social networks as active, feeling,  human beings. That feeling of being a-part-of, of being connected. Only, the irony is that this is not actual human connection. It’s a bubble of mind-trickery and instant gratification. I want friend requests, likes, retweets and DMs in real life, dammit!  

Oh, this sweet, modern world we live in!

Using social networks is a major love/hate relationship for me but without it I don't know what I'd do with myself! They are my little friends throughout the day, my company, my escape. This, however, doesn’t stop me from complaining about them, just like I do about my real friends! 

Facebook :

The Original. I like Facebook because you get a lot of different kinds of information on it – people’s private life stuff/constructions, pictures, videos, articles, links, game scores. Yaaaay-ish!

But, Facebook to me is like going to a Joburg fete. It’s the place you go when there are absolutely no other fun things happening in the city and where you going to bump in to  a lot of annoying teenagers, old classmates, aunties/uncles and randoms - just people who don't interest you and whose lives you don't want necessarily want to know about. Nor do you want them to know too much about yours.

Facebook to me these days is so random and so communal - it’s the last place I go to post anything because I just feel that’s it’s a very public and open space to share things with people that are not necessarily my closest friends.  I mean I use social networks but I also don't want people I never see or hang out with all up in my bizznizz. Having said that, I feel more in control over the people I share things with on other social networks, mostly because those are newer and have a more updated version of people that are in my life. Also, I’m too lazy to go and remove every acquaintance on my long list of Facebook friends when I have other alternatives to use, you know? Facebook a place for the spreading of mass information like, “Oh hey, I’m moving to another country”, rather than day-to-day events “Yo! I saw this pretty sunset I saw today!”

Also, I must just say that in my experience the people who use Facebook as their primary social network are not usually the most cutting edge or interesting people, with the most fascinating or thought-provoking stuff to say/share, thus dulling my experience even more. Shame Facebook, I BEEN over you.


Twitter:

I like to refer to Twitter as the big black hole on the Internet where inspired, great thoughts and ideas go to die. Well, for me anyway.  This is because when I have a thought that I actually like or deem valuable or super cool, I usually tweet it For example: my dream job of being a puppy photographer/Disney songwriter. I almost forgot they were my dreams after tweeting them!!! Tweeting quickly puts one’s thoughts out there and leaves one satisfied. In so doing, your thought seem to be shared, expressed, done. What this does however, is it prevents me from developing and reflecting on the idea, thought or opinion – it just ends up being tweeted and left at that. So for example, if I have an idea for a song or poem and think up a really cool line for it, I tweet that line. But, I never actually get down to writing it somewhere, thinking about it more or developing it even further by writing more lines and completing the idea. Or if I’m feeling frustrated by something, I can quickly just bitch about it in 140 characters or less and feel better, instead of really considering the situation and how I could learn from it or what I could take from it, instead of resorting to the quick fix of complaining about it.

 The idea of instant gratification here is a biggie. Twitter gives me both the comfort and illusion of being heard, even though all I’ve done is wasted a thought on a few hundred people, most of whom are probably not even active on Twitter.  It’s just a guise of expression. See, I told you it’s a deep dark Internet hole! Eventually the idea or thought is forgotten and the potential for its development also dies. 

I have obviously come to realize that Twitter is the wrong platform for these inspired brain farts and opinions on life. But it is a lovely, sticky web for the laziness of thinking and dealing with life, and also for the fear of writing. Two problems I have literally just discovered I have! Haha!  And meh.

Instagram:

Let me not even try to deny it - I love Instagram. It is the most stimulating social network to me. Statuses and information aka hashtags/description and pictures, both of which usually tend to be of a higher quality - literally and figuratively. It’s the best of both worlds.  It’s streamlined, with a focus of higher quality content than any other social networks and I think it’s pushing us in a strong direction in terms of technology, dissemination of information, our individual use of creativity and overall higher standards on the internet. I like it. 

As an individual user however, it’s a freakin stressful situation for me. I never know which of my 250 images I capture of 2 hours of my day I should actually Instagram. I’m always confused about which of those pictures are the best, which most authentically expresses what I want to show people (I always want to keep it real, no lies or fake representations) which do I look the best in (haaa! I know you do it too), how many pictures are too many of the same event, the time frame of posting… (side note : I once had a friend tell me she unfollowed me because #latergrammed too much. Really though?? I enjoy basking in certain moments because sometimes life is THAT good and THAT sacred). Don’t even get me started on choosing a filter! As an active user, I do want to share cool pictures that are of a good quality which will be appreciated by the above-average Instagram user (Yoh, I think I’m fancy huh!). Ensuring this happens though, is clearly a headache in my life. 

In addition, I do find myself doing a lot of eye rolling at the unavoidable culture of self-promotion and ego boosting that I come across on Instagram from including and notwithstanding the repertoire of too many selfies, too much showing off, too many hot bods, constructions vs reality, virtual realities, bling bling, etc etc. Instagram makes all this pretty normal and acceptable, even though I think we can do better as young humans. I do enjoy high-fashion posts, #ootd, Beyonce’s feed (also #bringbadgalririback!), design ideas, behind the scenes of lives and what’s happening in everyday lives, pretty, faraway places, pics of jewelry, wedding dresses and tattoos and of course the real reason I even got Instagram – pictures of baby animals!!!! So, I guess it’s not all bad.  Also, have you ever seen a picture baby hippo?? Just do it.

It’s a complicated and modern world we live in. When there wasn’t Instagram, there were polaroids. When there was no Facebook, there were letters and phone calls. When there was no Twitter, there were more public outbursts, I’m sure. These forms way of communication and expressions have always existed in some shape or form (So, stop blaming the demise of moral society on Facebook, old people). I guess it’s how we navigate through it all that makes the difference. I could never understand people who never ever had Facebook or don’t use any social networks, and I probably still don’t, but I do envy the peace that they have every day. Me, personally, I am going to try and focus on being more present and patient in all moments and maybe chatting up a stranger in the parking lot, or writing with a pen and paper more. Hey, maybe I’ll even scream at the top of my lungs with delight or annoyance in the grocery store. But first, I gotta update all my statuses with this blog post. The blasted irony.


Let me know how you feel about this too!

Peace!

Nafeesa x

P.S Just thought of posting blog posts to people. Like actually in the post. It can be the new blogging!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No? Ok bye.

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